Smug

I describe my mood today as smug. Or giddy. 

I specifically googled for the meaning of smug and here it is:

smug adj.  Exhibiting or feeling great or offensive satisfaction with oneself or with one's situation; self-righteously complacent: "the smug look of a toad breakfasting on fat marsh flies" (William Pearson).

And here comes the telling part. Why smug? Why, of all the adjectives known to man, stupid or not. I promised myself once upon a time that I should never rest on my laurels. Thinking about it right now makes me feel awkward. For a nano-second, that is. So why smug? It's very complicated. It has something to do with my forthcoming birthday. Next week, I'll be celebrating my 30th year on earth. 

I have resolved that I will not rush things. I shall enjoy life and enjoy what it brings to me on a daily basis. I shall gladly embrace every pitfalls and learn from them. No critical errors, no alarming faults, no regrets to think of. None of those. 

When I try to look back, somewhat year 2000-ish, I'd say I have evolved. In a much critical way, I don't want my old self back. I like myself more now. What I am today is a totally different individual compared to my 20-year-old self. My close friends and family can attest to this fact. And that alone makes me feel smug. Or giddy.

Not so telling? I'll elaborate on this next time. Emotions can be very erratic. I may not be as smug as I am today on the day I want to elaborate.