If Today Is My Birthday (Part 1)

If today is my birthday, then I might have woken up early. I'll take my cold morning shower complete with all my daily rituals - from milk soap to strawberry yoghurt body scrub to anti-hair fall shampoo to gentle facial wash up to southern region wash. The works! And other vain rituals after that - all in the name of preserving and taking good care of my human body.

 Then I'd wear my favorite white shorts and orange polo shirt and some old multi-colored sandals. After successfully combing my hair and gasping at the several strands of hair falling on the floor (I've said this before - shampoo TVCs are all lies), I'd tell my husband to have a pancake breakfast. Oh, the husband's fully groomed and shower-fresh already! He loves cold morning showers and I love it too. So, erase that naughty smile! It's called marriage and water-saving tip combined.

I love to cook but I don't really love washing the dishes after the slicing and cooking. And it's my birthday anyway! I'm entitled to a free pass. So off we go to devour pancakes and bacon and sausages.

After the mighty lard consumption, I would feel guilty. Then I would start thinking organic greens and fresh air. And since it's my birthday, the husband has no right to complain. He would just meekly obey me.

We're going to Tagaytay again! While traversing the boring SLEX, the husband will start cracking corny tales. Me? I enjoy listening to Katy Perry and sing my heart out to '90s music. So that's exactly how I will behave en route to Tagaytay. I will not do any backseat driving because I fully entrust my fate on the road to my husband these days. And it's my birthday anyway! I will not stress myself over SLEX and its goddamn VAT.


..... to be continued.

Anna Dominique & Anna Sophia

Dear Anna Dominique & Anna Sophia,

You both be strong and courageous today. My thoughts are with you both.

I, the big sister, am virtually holding your hands and praying with you as you step into this exciting phase of our lives.

I can't wait to hold your soft hands and smell your baby breath, Anna Sophia.

Please don't let your Mommy Anna Dominique feel any unnecessary pain. Just slide through that comfort zone of yours and make it quick!

We are all excited to meet you, baby!


Praying and holding back tears,
Ate/Auntie

Should've Never

Mediocrity. Once upon a time, whenever I hear that word, I cringe. I cower in fear. I shiver. I am not a big fan of it and yet, I placed it here to introduce this post. So I lied. I didn't cringe or cowered in fear or shivered. And that brings me to go in-depth, to search deep and investigate why that particular word doesn't affect me at all. Here are my assumptions, written randomly and God only knows what else:

For the past two years, did I become numb to living in mediocrity?
Maybe I'm surrounded with mediocre people. Uh-oh.
I am not armed with powerful artillery of courage to face more challenging tasks.
Blech. Can't think of any.

This is alarming. I should stop being mediocre. I should explore the possibilities. After all, I'm already independent and about to get married, for crying out loud! I should maximize the positive energy circulating in my system or whatever's left of it.

Sigh.*


*written while watching Typhoon Chedeng make a landfall

On Fake Diet, Thursday Edition

How do I diet? Or un-diet? Let me count the ways.

For breakfast: 1/2 cup rice, three pieces of tocino (sweetened cured pork) and sunny side up, two pieces of suman sprinkled with brown sugar and brewed coffee

In-between: 3 pieces of Fita spicy tuna crackers

Lunch: thick & tender chops, java rice and pizza fries from Greenwich

Dinner: taco salad, sweetened bananas, 4 pieces of siomai and sago gulaman

When will I get serious with diet? Quando, quando, quando.

Thirsty Thursday

I thirst for countless things today. I have this seemingly crazy idea that I should be able to do/accomplish them before 2010 ends. And, right now, I don't think I can be as unfailingly patient as before. So, the following are mandatory:

1) Finish my travel plan for Vietnam. This has been very, very difficult for me since I have to adjust to my trip companions' quirks. Or I'm just making a big deal out of it? I simply do not know. It was way too exciting at first when I drafted my initial plan but halfway through it, I literally gave up! Something's wrong with me, for sure. All the hype went to nowhere. So I must summon all my mental energy just to get hyped up once again. Help!

2) Go to Sonya's Garden in Tagaytay. I may not go gaga over fresh garden salads but the laid-back idea of experiencing nature excites me. The cool breeze of Tagaytay is just a bonus. Or wait, maybe that's the biggest factor. I need to escape the metro's crazy weather. Rain, shine, rain, shine, ugh. The cycle is on the verge of lunacy, enough to make me crazy.

3) Have a serious foot spa AND body massage/body scrub. I need to pamper myself. I know my savings will be corrupted but I have to splurge once and for all for my sanity. I need the peace and quiet to converge totally with every pores of my body.

4) Cook an extremely delicious pasta. I need to don my imaginary chef's hat to whip up that extraordinary pasta. With wine and bread. And pretend I'm in one of those picturesque places in Italy. Who will be the judges with regard to the taste? Mi familia.

5) Hit the beach. But definitely no island-hopping or boat rides. I fear the deep, blue sea.

6) Splurge on a dinner buffet. This entails a lot of discipline. I must unload all the greasy fat seating in my tummy. Soooooooooooon!

My brain suddenly froze when I was about to type number 7. This is a doable list. If all these won't be accomplished, then my last quarter is an epic fail. Nooooooooooooooo, universe, nooooooooo!

Central Memories Part 2

Dinalaw na naman ako ng antok dito sa opisina. Upang hindi tuluyang antukin, sinubukan kong mag-isip ng mga bagay na maaaring gumising sa aking natutulog na diwa. Tutal naman naumpisahan na din ang pagbabalik-tanaw sa kabataan, atin na lang ipagpatuloy ang Central Memories.

Noong Grade 1 ako, napansin ko na kakaunti ang mga mapuputi sa classroom namin. Kung ikukumpara ang kulay ng balat ko noon sa ngayon, di hamak na mas maputi na ako ngayon. Pero sigurado ako na hindi ako maitim at hindi din naman ako sobrang puti. Fair complexion, ika nga. Hindi ko masyadong binigyang pansin ang kahalagahan ng pagiging maputi or hindi noon. Paki ko, basta ako, ayaw ko ng maputing gatas! Wow, paki-connect nga. I mean, ayaw ko ng gatas na pure. Mas gusto ko ay 'yong gatas na may halong Milo or Ovaltine. Sige na nga, milk chocolate!

Nung college na 'ko, saka ko naisipan na tingnan muli ang mga class pictures ko nung elementary. Una kong napansin sa Grade 1 class pic ay kung gaano ako kaputi noon. Nagulat ako. Sunod kong tiningnan ay kung sino-sino pa ang mga matatawag na mapuputi. Bukod sa sarili ko, may tatlo pa. Hindi ko na maalala mga full names nila kasi naman antagal na. Duh, 1987.

Yung isa, lalake. Naalala ko na anak siya ng may-ari ng parlor sa may Velez Street. Nakakatuwa dahil nalaman ko ito nung minsang sumama ako kay Mama sa parlor nila upang siya'y magpagupit. Mahilig kasi si Mama magpagupit ng buhok. Hahaba lang ng ilang sentimetro ay magpapagupit na. Therapy niya daw 'yon.

Yung pangalawang maputi, may lahing Intsik. Surname niya ay Go kaya sa tuwing siya ay susunduin ng kanyang tatay tuwing uwian, nagkakantyawan kami ng "Go, ****, go!" Ibig sabihin, bilisan niya ang pagtakbo sa gate kung saan inaantay siya.

Yung pangatlo, kapangalan ko pa. Si Apple Jade. Mukha siyang batang laging may rasyon na labada. Lagi kasing nakataas ang buhok ng isang malaking clip na parang maglalaba lang sa batis. Maganda pa naman at maamo ang mukha. Tuwing tinitingnan ko ang aming class pic, para bang may palo-palo na nakatago sa kanyang likuran. 

Nakakatuwa palang magbalik-tanaw tungkol sa kulay ng balat. Nawala tuloy antok ko.

Central Memories Part 1

Kanina ako'y naupo sa paminggalan dito sa opisina at nakinig sa iba't ibang istorya ng buhay.

Bigla ko tuloy naalala ang aking kabataan at ang mga taong nagpasaya nito.

Naalala ko, higit sa lahat, ang aking mga kaklase/kabarkadang ubod ng kulit at galing. Ang tawag sa aming grupo ay "7 stars". Sino ba naman ang makakalimot sa mga 'yon? Parang kelan lang na merong pitong bata na pinagtagpo-tagpo sa primera klaseng mababang paaralan ng aming syudad.

Noon, hindi ko naisip na malaki pala ang agwat ng isang taga-public school sa isang taga-private school. Siguro dahil masaya at kumpleto naman ang aking mga gamit sa eskwela at meron akong baon. Hindi ko kailangang manghingi ng papel o manghiram ng lapis sa katabi kasi nga madami akong ganoon. Pero napansin ko na mas maputi ang medyas ng mga taga-private school kesa sa public school. Ano ba yan? Medyas pa napansin ko. At syempre pa, mas makintab at hindi maputik ang sapatos ng mga taga-private. Siguro dahil na rin sa katotohanang marami sa public school ang galing sa mahihirap na lugar sa siyudad.

Naalala ko tuloy ang kwento ng Mama ko nung Grade 1 ako. Sa pagkakaalam ko, may labinlimang seksyon sa Grade 1. At isa ako sa mapalad na nakaakyat sa stage para tumanggap ng gold medal. Syempre sikat ka pag may gold medal noong araw. Kinabukasan, pagkagaling nila Mama at Papa sa palengke, sabi ng Mama ko, binati siya nung suki niya ng isda sa palengke. Ang galing pala ng anak mo,  nakatanggap ng gold! [Wow! Sana pwedeng isanla 'no?] Nakita kasi nung tindera na umakyat si Papa sa stage para sabitan ako ng medal. Nagkataon din na ang anak niya pala ay isa din sa pinarangalan sa mataas na baitang naman.

Tuwing naalala ko yun, masaya ako. Hindi lang pala sa opisina napupuri ang Mama at Papa ko na may anak sila na honor student, kundi pati din pala sa palengke. Napagtanto ko na doon nagsimula ang salitang "pressure" sa aking buhay.

N.B. This series shall be called "Central Memories". I went to City Central School in elementary and I believe the place contributed a much bigger part of me and who I am today. Names of persons shall be withheld, if need be, so as not to cause undue embarrassment and injury to them.